Leaving it all behind

Well i don’t know about you but i think the second half of 2019 well and truly whizzed by, and although i’m partly grateful for the gentle propel in to the feeling-back-to-myself zone, i am left wondering where the heck the last 5/6 months actually went. With that being said i thought i’d use the opportunity to have a look back on the year and have a moment of reflection in both memories and feelings, as i think it’s important as we move in to a new year (and decade jeez)

So for me 2019 began with a trip to Berlin which was a gift i got for my boyfriend at the time. Berlin is such a great place to visit and it was really beautiful to experience it in the winter months, as the previous time i went it was in the height of summer. This time around it was so bladdy cold though. I’m talking minus degrees. I’m not sure i actually felt my fingers or toes during the whole trip, but it was worth the pain. I’d definitely recommend experiencing the city in both hot and cold climates as you get to experience it in totally different ways. The summer months see you hiring bikes and exploring all of the outdoors treasures and the winter calls for finding hidden gems to shelter from baltic temperatures in.

I also took a really quick trip to Brugge by ferry in January with some work friends which was actually my first time there. Brugge is very architecturally stunning which makes it great to photograph, and due to the time of year it was white over with snow which made for even better in pictures. I really wish we had more time there to explore as we were only there a matter of hours, but it’s definitely somewhere i want to explore again.

Both trips were a great opportunity to properly get in to film photography which is something i started taking a proper interest in in 2019. It was super fun to take pictures and be unable to see how they looked until i had them developed (they turned out a dream fyi) If you are planning a trip to either of these places, want more information or just want to see some cool photographs that i took, then i did write a blogpost all about them which you can find here

The month of March saw me hit my 27th year of life, which i celebrated in Leeds with some of my best friends. In true Jade style i spilt Prosecco and pesto pasta down my gold satin skirt on the train ride there before i’d even had a proper drink *face palm* In spite of that though i had a wonderful day and now the impending doom of 28 is fast approaching.

Moving on to the Summer months i went on the annual Kemp holiday to Ibiza in June which was a blast as usual. You haven’t experienced a sunset until you’ve sat on the rocks at Cafe Mambos with a can of G&T bought from the local supermarket and watched it with hundreds of strangers. Honestly such a good feeling and everybody is so encapsulated in the moment, it really is magical (i hear you saying ‘er what are you taking about it’s ibiza?’ but just trust me)

July was a total blur of a month in honesty. Well the first half at least. My long term relationship ended and my life shifted in to complete new territory. I had to learn to take hold of the rains of my life and set myself on a new path. I began living alone in my house for the first time and i also had to begin to learn how to enjoy my own company. This is something which in honesty i’ve found really tricky. I’ve not spent much time ‘single’ in my adult life and therefore it’s brand new to me but i’m learning slowly how to okay with being by myself. Before and during this time i experienced anxiousness for the first time properly and it’s something i’ve not really spoken about to anybody, but it was a part of my year and so i’m not going to pretend it never happened. As it turns out the break up was a really good thing for me, and it truly has helped me make sense of some things in my life. Sometimes things just don’t work out and that’s okay because you’re about to be flung in to the next chapter of your life and boy am i ready for that.

July wasn’t all doom and gloom, it did have some nice bits in too i may add. Hull Pride for example which was a fun day and thanks to some tickets from my work i managed to drink copious amounts of Pimms from a red bus and watch Claire from steps perform which made me feel 8 again. It certainly took my mind of things for a day at least and a dear friend came to the rescue when i was feeling low. Werewolf, you know who you are.

Moving in to August and the good old Humber Stree Sesh (which you’ll only really know about if your from Hull) For anyone who isn’t familiar, it’s a festival where local bands get to play and showcase their talent, we all eat and drink booze till our hearts are content and act like fools with our friends. I had a wobble which involved tears but my friends are truly the best, i couldn’t have got through the day without them. I wore the white denim boiler suit of dreams and i can’t quite believe it came home still white. I amaze myself.

I also went away with my parents and sister to Cyprus for a lovely all inclusive break for a week in August. It’s exactly what i needed and in honestly i just laid on a sun lounger with my nose in a book and relaxed my mind and body. So very zen of me i know.

In September my Auntie had her hen do which was fabulous, i had some lovely nights out with friends and i felt like i started feeling like i was getting back to me again.

In October i said goodbye to Karter who was my little Ford Ka which was a very sad day indeed. We’d been in two crashes together and i’d spent three times its worth fixing it since i got it, but he was my first baby and he went to car heaven in exchange for 63 English pounds. As sad as that day was, it meant i could finally get my new baby in the form of a VW Beetle. This car is something i’ve wanted since i was young so to finally have one is a dream for me. Back when i was in Berlin i took a photograph of a 1950’s style Beetle and said to it one day i will own a modern version of you and i guess it paid off. Put it out in the universe kids and you just never know what might happen!

I also took my sister to a pumpkin patch in October which was a first for the both of us. We definitely learnt that suitable footwear is to be well thought out before we get there next time, as muddy would be a bloody understatement. The actual day of Halloween is one of my friends Birthday and so she had a party at her house the day after to which i attended dressed as a mermaid and lived my best life.

In November i went to Amsterdam on the ferry for my stepdad’s birthday which has become a yearly tradition. It rained a lot, we walked a lot and i ate so much crap in place of actual meals that i’m surprised i didn’t actually combust.

December was filled with so much love. Works Christmas party, one of my best friends little girl turned 6 (she’s so wonderful), me and my friends had our annual cheese and wine night, we then had a day out in town filled with booze and food, i had a Christmas meal with my two best friends, i had meal with my Dad and Sister, i took my baby sister to the Pantomime on Christmas eve and then BAM Christmas day.

Turns out 2019 was a mixed bag and whilst i was looking back on the key moments of the year to put together this post, i realised that it was exactly what i needed to understand just how fortunate i am. Amongst all the good stuff, the last year also came with some heart ache, not only from my breakup, but from sad news in relation to my friends and family and so remembering just how blessed i am feels so important right now. If there’s one thing i know for sure it’s that you can’t predict the future and you can’t alter the past, but you can enjoy the right here and now. So live with honesty and kindness, take life by the bloody horns and please 2020 for the love of god bring me some more badass two pieces to wear!

Jade x

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